2005 style

one morning in September, i walked from my brick shotgun 1 bedroom apartment (with the old school black and white tiled bathroom hung with blue lights), to the Straw Ibis coffeehouse, at that time the only independent coffeehouse in Logan, Utah.

When I walked up to the counter to order, the barista handed me a cappuccino and said someone had already paid.  I insisted they had mistaken me for someone else, but she maintained someone was expecting me.

I found him in the back room, smiling at me over his cup

having driven through the night to surprise me in the morning.

(without warning, mind you.)

: the sort of surprise that lets you feel the open space

around your throbbing heart

(exhilarating, terrifying gravity).

We walked to the farmers market, where we bought a loaf of bread

dizzy and drunk on each other, with the Wasatch Mountains leaning into the autumn sky overhead.  I dared to think i might live this way;

loved by someone who would drive 890 miles through the night

to surprise me for coffee

and who promised he would never

let me hide from myself.

It is seven years on now, and just now he surprised me again

2005 style.

We don’t touch this gravity quite so often anymore.

I head to work as he comes home, most days.  We are bleary eyed after my late nights waitressing, and 3 am wakeups with the babe, and his early mornings headed to work.  We are worried about money, and the car, and our old house.  We are behind on dishes, laundry, and yardwork.  There are days when we’re  not sure how we’ll pull it all off,

except for that we take turns being confident there’s a way

and every now and then

one of us remembers to take it back to 2005

and we are Right Here again,

astonished

teary eyed

and grateful enough

to go on for years.

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1 Comment

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One response to “2005 style

  1. Oh my goodness. I’m totally hooked on your blog now. Such truth and beauty 🙂 I have work to do, but this is way more interesting!!!

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